Beach Babies

When I first saw Adele Enersen's photographs at Mila's Daydreams I was completely in love.  They featured a peacefully sleeping babe, with an intricate scene created by blankets and fabric.  I just could  not get enough of her images, and am looking forward to purchasing her book soon.

In the meantime, we've decided to create our own pictures in the same style.  Hopefully with a little creativity, we'll be able to incorporate both babies in the pictures with some creativity - and even get them to stay still long enough to snap a picture.  Our first attempt is a beach scene, since our family loves beaches of all types and it seemed like a perfect "dream" for a mid-February afternoon.

Julianna - with brown throw (sand) blue bedspread (sky), brown dress (tree trunk)
two green sweaters (palms) and  yellow t-shirt (sun).

Our next project will most likely be a rainbow for St. Patrick's day because just as much as we love our beach - we love being Irish too.  Wish us luck!

Oh Make Me Over

I've been spending more time in the world of blog-land, and am so jealous of all of the super lovely (professional, put-together, appealing) blogs out there and figured "I'm computer savvy - how hard could it be?"  After a week of obsessively scouring vector graphic databases, reviewing blogger tutorial forums, and struggling with HTML caos, I've decided it's pretty tough.

I'm such a perfectionist, and have an addictive personality when it comes to overcoming a challenge.  It's an asset when it means being committed to success (which explains why my twins are still getting breast milk despite two months of challenges), but that drive is also detrimental when it becomes an inability to "leave well enough alone."  My blogging goals aren't to monetize and make tons of cash, nor do I expect to be a famous blogging celebrity someday.  I don't even have the ego that needs fed by having 1000 subscribers.  I just like to reflect, and think that recording my thoughts through this journey will be fun to look back on.  It might entertain family and friends, or encourage another twin mom in her journey.  So I have no need to spend our limited budget on a blog designer.

I have done my little blog make-over myself.  And while it's certainly not perfect, I wanted to provide credit where credit is due.  I did find it pretty difficult to find the information I needed to get the job done.  Most tutorials I found were either so basic (as in "here's how to start a new post with blogger") or so advanced that there were completely unhelpful.  The few places that were helpful were amazing though, so perhaps these links will help someone else who finds themselves in the same predicament I did.

Banner and Widget Title Graphics: http://dryicons.com/free-graphics/category/frames-banners/
Customized myself in Adobe Illustrator (boy did I learn a thing or two playing around!)

Social Media Icons: http://www.webdesignerdepot.com/2009/04/24-free-exclusive-vector-icons-handy/ found http://bestdesignoptions.com/?p=13779
Created the matching Pinterest Icon since that wasn't included in the set.  Not too bad if I do say so myself!

Coding, Spacing, Etc: http://www.projectalicia.com/2011/01/idiots-guide-to-adding-social-media.html
http://www.google.com/support/forum/p/blogger/thread?tid=5ec0a6e5c8b8c95f&hl=en
http://www.geekytricks.com/2011/08/how-to-increase-or-reduce-space-between-widgets.html

Still a few little tweaks I can make, but hoping I can let go of my perfection obsession long enough to enjoy my accomplishment in the meantime.

A Tale of a Poopy Princess

There once was a perfect little princess named Julie who liked to snooze without worry and spend her days lounging in pink.  She was particularly excited one evening when her Daddy came home, cuddled her in his lap, and fed her a bottle of milk.  Little Julie was enjoying her late evening meal, when all of a sudden, her Daddy exclaimed  with terror "Oh God!  She's pooping on me!"

Julie's Grammy sprang into action to pick up Julie from her frantic father. Grammy was shocked to discover a poopy puddle on the ground!  Amazingly the poopy little princess had managed to poop out the top of her diaper, and onto the floor - thus sparing her precious little polka dot pants.

 The Poopy Puddle

Princess Julie's Shocked Reaction

 Brayden - Unfazed

The Frustrated Father with his Carpet Steamer

Snugglin' Up Close

I'm quickly learning that one of the biggest challenges as a parent is the sincere desire to do what's best for your kids, even when what's best isn't clear.  We've been having some nighttime troubles with the babies which we think are due in part to their acid reflux and gas.  Sometimes it seems that nothing will soothe them other than cuddling with their exhausted mamma.  Even from the very first few nights home, I often felt as if I was doing sit-ups to replace a spit out binky into the mouth of a wailing Julianna in the crib near our bed.

So we bought a "co-sleeper."  This little contraption fits between Mom and Dad in the bed, and allows our baby to rest soundly on a firm mattress, surrounded by a railing to prevent any dangers such as pillow suffocation, or parental roll over.  The challenge though, is that this isn't a very big sleeping space, and doesn't offer much in the way of providing warmth comfort and intimacy for my fussy babies.  Plus, as a mamma of two - there's no room even in a King bed for two of these plus parents.

I've been stuck with such a fear of SIDS, and rightly so not wanting to put my babies at any unnecessary risk.  There are though times that when at your wits end, there don't seem like many other alternatives than bringing baby into the bed.

Our cuddle sessions began (and have largely remained) in the mornings.  After Dan leaves for work at 7, and babies are wide awake, they join me in the bed to extend our morning sleep until at least the next feeding comes.  Lucky for me, this time is some of the most solid sleep I get!  Of course I knew to remove any blankets or pillows close to the babies and to keep them on their backs, but I wanted to do some more research on safe "co-sleeping" as I know many people do this full time with their babies.

I was so surprised to read, after a quick google search, the very credible research done that indicates that co-sleeping actually reduces the risks of SIDS by providing babies with deeper sleep - which allows them to arouse more quickly when dangerous breathing patterns occur in their immature respiratory system.

Doctor Sears, a well known and respected pediatrician gives his very positive perspectives on co-sleeping in a Parenting.com article.  The University of Notre Dame's "Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Lab" also has research that shows many benefits of co-sleeping for breastfeeding mothers, but sets some limitations for those who formula feed their babies.

For our family, I'm not sure of how often and to what level we'll engage in the practice of co-sleeping, but I was relieved to hear that I'm not putting my children at danger when following basic guidelines for their safety in bed.  It's also so lovely to snuggle close with them, and feel them relax as they're comforted by my presence.  I think that's really what all mothers want - to gave their babies what is best for them.  Whether that's in our bed or out, what's clear as that what's best for them is to be close to their family.

Becoming Mamma

So it's been almost a month since I posted anything, but as you can imagine, I've had my hands full with two new little ones and so finding time to blog has been limited.  It's so important to me to document these days though, so I'm going to work harder to steal a few moments to write.  I especially wanted to make sure I recorded my "birth story" before I forgot all of the details.

So after postponing our cesarean for a week due to Julie's potential lung issues, our eagerness and anxiety had reached it's peak on December 22.  I slept surprisingly well the night before (considering the countdown to the biggest day of my life), and we were out the door by 6 a.m..  My wonderful parents insisted on arriving at the same time we did, just to give me a hug before I went in.  I was really glad they were there in retrospect as I was quite the ball of nerves.  We were called back at 7 a.m., and began preparations for surgery.  I was amazed at how quickly everything happened really.  I put on my hospital gown, had my heart rate and blood pressure monitored, and my nurse (Haley) talked me through the preparations.  One major issue at this point in the game was my IV.  While Haley gave it a good shot - it collapsed in my one "good vein" and we had to wait for the anesthesiologist to arrive to give it another shot.  I had prayed and prayed to have good nurses and anesthesiologists, and God really came through.  Dr Somethingorother - who preferred to be called Max - came to talk me through the anesthesia and do my IV.  He had to go deep in my wrist, even giving me a shot of local first to numb the pain.  My doctor stopped by to see how I was doing, and soon enough, it was time to go into the opperating room.

I walked in myself, and was suprised how small it was. I guess I watch too much Grey's Anatomy and expected this huge room with high ceilings. My nurse got me through the spinal, I layed back on the table and then Dan came in beside me. By this point, I was over being nervous, but was sure glad to see him.
The doctors kept pinching my skin, and each time, I could feel the pain on my left side. They kept waiting thinking the spinal just needed more time, but, it never changed. Luckily, Max had put in both a spinal and an epidural cathetar, so they were able to dose me up so I didn't feel the surgery.

So one thing I didn't expect (and maybe my experience was unique) was how "out of it" I would feel both during and after the surgery.  The most distinct thing I remember while I was giving birth was the feeling that I was falling asleep, feeling like I had to mindfully remember to breathe, and that I was really really hot.  This was definitely unpleasant.

What made up for all that lousy feeling, was the moment I heard the babies cry, and their weights announced. We were shocked that Julianna weighed 6 lbs, 8 oz., and Brayden (who was supposed to be a very large baby) weighed only 5 lbs., 11 oz.  They gave Julianna to Dan to hold while they finished my surgery, and the nurse held Brayden close by.  Holding two at once seemed a bit intimidating to us both, but when they placed both babies in my arms as they wheeled me out of the OR - I was in heaven (and high as a kite).


Recovery was rough, still feeling like I had the worst hangover in the world, and like I was hanging out in a sauna.  Apparently this is a very unusual experience as most new moms in this situation are freezing cold.  I did throw up numerous times, and they continued to give me anti-nausea medications, which made the hangover feeling worse.

I had been worried about the fact that I wasn't going to get to eat for hours after the surgery, and unfortunately, I wasn't even able to keep down the ice chips they gave me.  While all of this does sound unpleasant (and it was) it's the reality of my experience.  The warm loveliness of holding my sweet babies took a bit of time for the meds to wear off - and certainly was amazing.

After the first day in the hospital, I was a much happier new Mamma, and got a chance to really enjoy the blessing of my babes.  I could hardly get over how Brayden stared into your eyes with such intensity.  He was (and is still) so very tiny.  Julianna has such a laid back personality, stretches around, and came out with a head full of puffy little hair.  The hospital stay was much better than expected with delicious food, and patient and accommodating nurses who gave me everything I needed - and gave me space.  My parents stayed for most of the days and evenings while I was there, and my in-laws came Friday to meet their new grand-children.

I had expected to be out of the hospital on Monday due to medication issues, which was then changed and so expected discharge would have been Sunday - Christmas Day.  Luckily, I was doing so well that they allowed me to leave Saturday Night around 9 p.m. on Christmas Eve.  It was so great to not have to spend Christmas in the hospital (despite the good food).  We even were able to make it out to Aunt  Kim's Christmas Dinner the next night.

Overall with the birth experience, I'd say the following:
Spinal and Epidural:  Better than I expected
Surgery:  Better than I expected
First 12 hours after Surgery: Much worse than I expected.
Overall Hospital Stay:  Better than I expected
Holding those babies and knowing that they are mine forever:  Better than I could have imagined in my wildest dreams.