So here it is - the premier of Twin Tip Tuesdays. Each Tuesday, I'll share a little something that helped me along the way, a review of a twin pertinent product, or an issue that focuses on twins. Usually these will apply to everyone else too - especially those of you who continue to say "I don't know how you do it!" Well now you'll know...
My first Twin Tip Tuesday recommendation is to find a support group. I know I know - your kids are such a handful that you can hardly get out of the house (stay tuned for next week's tip) but it's really really worth it!
I joined a local "new moms" playdate group probably around when my kids were three months old. And it wasn't until they were eight months old that I was brave enough to take even one of them out of the house alone to spend some time with other girls. It was that bad!
And is it a challenge? Sure... I had one of the other moms tell me "oh I have two kids so I understand" when I was trying to explain. No offense - but you don't understand. Your three-year-old can walk on his own, listen to "stay right there" and climb in and out of his booster seat alone. Mine - not so much. Having two kids at the very same stage IS very difficult - especially when that stage is one of much reliance on Mom. My point is, I feel your pain and hesitation.
But once I dived in, and got to know these wonderful girls, I couldn't imagine my days without them. We're very active on facebook and chat about everything related to motherhood - kids, dinner, husbands, Mother-In-Laws, breastfeeding, diapering, who needs to visit the doctor and who achieved what milestone. I am especially lucky that almost all of these girls have kids within a year of my twins age so we have a lot in common.
Having mom friends is SO important to have a sounding block. My mom remembers having kids, but isn't "in the trenches." My girlfriends who were in my wedding are still very very important to me (love you guys) - but they have their limits to what they want to hear. Will they watch a video of your little darling dancing? Absolutely. Spend a few minutes talking about what the kids are eating lately? Sure. But going into the gory details of diaper duty and analyzing the details of immunization schedules? Not their deal.
It's awesome for the kids too. Brayden and Julie know all about playing with each other, but I never realized how outgoing Julie was until I let her run wild with her playgroup friends. I've discovered that Brayden adores running with other little boys and just glows like I've never seen him before. We get out with them once or twice a week, and it's GOOD to leave the house - especially when it gets a little overwhelming being at home.
Finally - it's good for Dad. How you ask? Because Mom's Night Outs are the perfect opportunity for him to spend an evening with the pair of wild children and gain a little appreciation for what you might struggle with every day. This is only my opinion but - they're his kids too... You shouldn't have to "ask him to watch them" just as he doesn't ask you when he makes plans. Communicate obviously, but I'm a firm believer that twin Dads need a taste of twin chaos from time to time to be reminded what an incredible breed we twin moms are.
My playgroup branched off of babycenter.com so that's a resource to check out as well as meetup.com or MOPS and MOMS. Find your place and settle in!
Don't forget to check in next week when I share our process for getting out of the house with two. A wild ride indeed!
