A Love Story (Part 4): Becoming Family

Just joining us on this journey of love? Why not go back and start with part one - here!

Back from Hawaii, we settled into a routine, spending as much time together as possible.  We got the sweetest dog, Duncan, and realized we could take care of something together.

The rest of that first year, we just enjoyed our time together.  Dan's house became "our place" and once empty rooms became filled with furniture and gained a "woman's touch."  I got to know his family, and he spent plenty of time with mine.  My whole family knew I was completely smitten with this Prince Charming.

We both worked a lot, but savored every bit of time together.  Through it all, I was always curious where his baggage was - his skeleton's in the closet.  I'm glad to report that regardless how much time passed, Dan was the same wonderful guy and had no nasty surprises lurking around the bend.

Right after our first Christmas together, Dan hinted that he'd bought a ring.  Each day I was so eager, waiting for him to pull it out of the cheese in the refrigerator - or have it tied to the dog - or spring it at New Years.

What I wasn't expecting though, was just a few days before our first anniversary, for him to call me upstairs.  I'd been watching a movie on the couch, and he'd been up there for a while.  I hadn't thought anything of it.

He called from the top of the steps, and I came to the staircase to see it decorated with flower petals and candles leading to upstairs.  He popped out of our bathroom with a "well hello" and dropped to one knee.  Obviously I knew what was happening - and was a tearful ball of emotion.  Of course, I accepted and we celebrated by enjoying a bottle of wine brought back with us from Hawaii.  Dinner at the Melting Pot followed and has become an annual anniversary tradition.

Wedding by Craig Photography

We got married a year and three months later in April 2010.  It was a beautiful blue sky day filled with joy and celebration.  When we welcomed our babies in December of 2011, it was a wild realization of how much our lives had been changed.  In less than four years, we'd met, married, traveled, and became parents to two amazing kids.

It's hard to believe that we've now been together for six years, but of course, these have been the best six years of my life.  I pray every night that I get to be with him for at least sixty years, so we've really only just begun our love story.  I have no rose colored glasses when I think about marriage.  It is hard work sometimes, and there's not a couple I know who haven't faced times of struggle in their lives together.  I know without a doubt though, that there is no other person I'd rather work beside, and together face life with, during the challenges and successes.

Moral of the story - never underestimate the power of a "wink" and some old fashioned chivalry.  Without a doubt, I found the man of my dreams.

Our whole story:
Part One: Our First Date
Part Two: In the Beginning
Part Three: Whirl Wind Romance
Part Four: Becoming Family

A Love Story (Part 3): A Whirl Wind Romance (and a cool Cabbie)

The saga story continues - but if you're just joining us, start with part one - here!

Three months into our relationship, Dan and I boarded our plane for a trip to Hawaii.  He'd work most days during our trip, and I'd wander around Honolulu on my own.  We did find time to sneak in some sight seeing, a surf lesson, and a hike through the rain forest.  Each evening we'd enjoy the most amazing meals I've ever eaten.  We would stand arm in arm on the sand and watch the sun set.  It was here that I knew I was utterly in love with this man, and that I'd hoped to spend the rest of my life with him.

...and we were only three months in...

The very last night of our trip we were to leave Hawaii in an evening flight, arriving through Charlotte and back to Pittsburgh in the early morning hours.  I'd be back just in time to make an important meeting.  On our way to check out of the hotel and meet our airport transportation, we listened to the voice messages on our phones telling us that our flights were delayed - as were all of the large aircraft of it's kind.  They were all being checked for some mechanical issue.  Coupled with the fact that this was the same week that Hawaiian Airlines was collapsing, the Honolulu Airport was pretty disastrous.  Our flight finally left around 1 a.m., now heading to LA where we'd transfer to Chicago and then Pittsburgh.  In LA, our flight was again delayed.  Arriving in Chicago, we hit terrible weather.  When we arrived, there were no more outgoing flights for the night and we were sent to a local hotel.  We'd now been attempting to get home for 24 hours.

Our cab driver that drove us to the hotel offered to pick us up and return us to the airport in the morning. He kept his promise, and dropped us off in front our ticket desks.  As I went to get my ID out of my purse - I made a horrifying realization: my purse was not in my backpack.  I'd left it in the cab...

Why is this long story pertinent in our love story?  Well, I'd dated my share of jerks - many of which would have gotten angry and frustrated in a situation like this.  Many would have yelled, criticized - and some would have even left me there to figure it out myself.  I had a moment of panic before I realized that Dan would do none of those things.  Calmly, he helped me solve the problem.  We found a policewoman, who helped us get through security.  The policewoman who actually found a priest who prayed with us for safe travels and for the purse to be found.

And of course, now waiting to get home (36 hours later) our flight is delayed - again.  We're sitting there utterly exhausted, and starting to consider renting a car to drive home from Chicago.  Our gate is changed and we shuffle through the airport like zombies.  And then - a miracle.

In storms a police officer.

"Are you Heather Keefe?"
"yes..."
"Your purse will be coming in through those doors in just a minute."

And there it was - my purse.  Every dollar in place, every tic-tac untouched.  We happily boarded our plane, and finally made it home - almost 48 hours after we first attempted to leave Hawaii.

Although the purse story is fun to tell, it is really very pertinent to "our story."  Despite the misadventure, I discovered that Dan and I could handle a bad situation.  He handled problems calmly, with patience and kindness.  I realized then, that Dan was the guy I'd want to have beside me no matter what challenges life threw our way.

Only one more chapter to go - keep reading here!

Our whole story:
Part One: Our First Date
Part Two: In the Beginning
Part Three: Whirl Wind Romance
Part Four: Becoming Family

A Love Story (Part 2): In the Beginning

If you're just joining us in the telling of "our story" make sure you start with part one - here!

After our first date, we quickly scheduled a second.  It may have actually only been two days later.  We went to Damons Sports Bar and watched a Cowboys football game.  Despite my lack of interest in football or the Cowboys, I was interested in Dan and that was enough to keep me occupied.  One thing that stood out all of this time is that Dan was the most polite guys I'd ever met.  He was a true gentleman, never overstepping boundaries or being too forward.

This time, after our date, he walked me to my car and planted one sweet kiss on these lips of mine.  And I smiled... and smiled... and smiled - the whole.way.home.  I think that was really what did it... he had my heart from that moment on.

Our next date was a little unusual - we went to IKEA with my Mom.  Now, we are a family of mighty faith, so when my mom retells her experience of God putting it on her heart that morning, that that day, she'd meet her son-in-law, I have no doubt.  After our shopping excursion, we went back to Dan's house (now our house) for the first time to watch a movie.  This was the day he asked me to be his "girlfriend" officially.  At first, I said I'd have to think about it, but after about half an hour I realized I was crazy to even consider not accepting, and said that I'd be happy to take that title.

Our Early Dates - Matrix (left) and Bowling (right) 2008

Dates to follow included bowling and dancing at the Matrix club.  We were having a wonderful time getting to know each other.  After a few weeks, Dan told me that he'd told his parents about me, and that they were glad he'd "found someone."  We joked that it was like he "found me under a rock" and that I'd picked him "out of a Russian Bride catalog" but his use of the phrase showed me that he was pretty interested.

As did his next commitment - signing up to take Salsa dance lessons with me.  While I'd planned to take the classes with a guy friend, Dan said he'd really want to do it with me.  In doing so, we set a regular Tuesday night date filled with dancing and usually dinner.  It was so nice knowing I'd get to see him during the week, and it would tide me over to weekend dates.

But we never did get to finish our Salsa sessions.  During one of our post-dancing dinners, we were talking about going on a little vacation together.  Dan said that he might need to go to Hawaii for work, and that maybe I could go too.  I was over the moon, and refused to even talk about it until we were certain we could go.  One afternoon I got the call - three months into our relationship, I'd be going to Hawaii with the nicest guy I'd ever met.  And it was then that I realized, I was the luckiest girl in the entire word...

Keep reading more about our love story here!

Our whole story:
Part One: Our First Date
Part Two: In the Beginning
Part Three: Whirl Wind Romance
Part Four: Becoming Family

A Love Story (Part 1): Our First Date

As Valentines Day approaches, I've been thinking about my own love and the amazing man I've had the privilege to marry.   You see, we do have a pretty special story, yet I'm not sure I've ever recorded it.  We'll be breaking it into multiple posts since it's pretty lengthy, but I wanted to offer as much detail as possible - for posterity sake. I figure maybe you'll be entertained by coming along for a ride.

So our story started in January of 2008, with me living back at home and working (like a dog) for the Girl Scouts.  I'd graduated a year previously, and with my graduation came the close of a two year relationship.  Working in an all female company for an all female clientele - I wasn't meeting any guys at work and really did't have the interest of meeting a guy in a bar.  I'd dated guys from my church before, but their attitudes of women didn't jive with my liberated ways.

It seemed pretty natural to turn to the internet as a potential place to meet someone - although I wasn't convinced that Prince Charming had posted a profile there.  After dabbling with eharmony (it felt like too many hoops for me), I turned to match.com to see who I might find.

I met Dan in January of 2008.  After looking through profiles of Pittsburgh guys, Dan's profile had caught my eye.  His headline read "Looking for a Nice Girl."  He had a handsome smile, and looked like a sweet guy.  Reading through his profile, he seemed so genuine and like a truly "nice guy."  My first impressions were right on.  I "winked" at him, and it wasn't long before he messaged me back.

Our Match.com Profile Pictures - circa 2008

We started talking online, became facebook friends, and just "clicked."  It's been six years, and the first voice mail he ever left me is still saved on my cell phone.  I've listened to it a million times, always smiling at how fond I've become of that once unfamiliar voice.  We scheduled our first date - dinner and a movie.  It all happened so quickly from our first interactions.

We decided to meet at Pittsburgh Mills Mall.  We would see Charlie Wilson's War and have dinner at Houlihans.  I remember walking through the doors and recognizing him immediately - he looked right at me and looked away.  WHAT??? He's lucky I didn't decide to walk right past, but I couldn't resist his really stylish shoes - silly I know, but one of my most vivid memories was thinking that he had some style.  What I didn't realize, was that Dan and I were the same height.  It had never come up, and I towered in chunky heels.  An interesting movie turned into dinner.

He was such a quiet guy - I honestly wasn't sure how the date was going!  We talked about work and our families.  I remember him first mentioning his brothers, moving from New York, and discovering that he had been an Eagle Scout.  "Maybe we can go camping together sometime" he suggested.  In my mind I was thinking it would never happen.  I can't put my finger on why, but that first date, I didn't think he was interested.  I actually didn't think that we'd ever see each other again.  Maybe it was because he seemed so "put together" and 23 year old me (still living at home) didn't feel like I was in the same league.

He walked me to my car, hand in hand, and said something along the lines of "I had a really nice time tonight, and would love to see you again soon."  Who would have thought that this simple but polite statement would melt my heart and be the very start of a lifetime together.

Our "Love Story" continues here!

Our whole story:
Part One: Our First Date
Part Two: In the Beginning
Part Three: Whirl Wind Romance
Part Four: Becoming Family

Moving from Surviving to Thriving

When the ball dropped to ring in the new year, I always feel like it's an awesome opportunity for a fresh start.  Personally, I like the hopefulness about it - it's like you can shed the previous struggles and open your fresh wings in the new year.

I really appreciate Coach Jenn who I had the pleasure of meeting at last year's MomCon who recommended for 2014, setting a theme vs a resolution.  For me, this year's theme will be moving from "surviving" as a mom with twins to "thriving."

What does that mean for me?

- Getting a handle on the physical chaos that our home can be in - from messes to heaps of laundry and household maintenance put off for the tenth time.

- Doing more than just getting through our days, but having intentional play and activities to enrich the kids development.

- To work on our personal well being, which for me means showering more than once every three days and occasionally using all the fancy shmancy makeup that I've collected.  It also means getting enough rest, drinking enough water, and eating better.

So where has that left me and how are we doing?  I have to say that I think we're really on track here a full month into the new year!  I've been using the flylady system (with some adaptations) to get a system in place to control our chaos.  I've been working on "theme weeks" for the kids that will bring together our crafts, field trips, songs, books, activities and more to help us develop some recognition and stay occupied.  And I'm doing quite a bit better with the personal well being, by trying to get dressed every day* and being more conscientious in what I'm eating.

I did cancel my weight watchers membership last night - and it's not because I don't want to eat better - but for me, in this moment, shifting my focus to these other elements really takes away from my time to do some other things, including track food.  Like I recently mentioned - I haven't been making many hair bows, nor have I been blogging a WHOLE lot (still working on that) but I think part of thriving is taking time to reevaluate the daily priorities.  Today, we're still in survival mode, but slowly but surely - I think we're going to make it there sometime in 2014!